The things she'd seen
by fallfromreality
Summary: When Jane passes out on the elevator, the team starts to realize that she's not as fine as she seems. Will they be able to help her? Or is she too far gone to accept their help?
1. Chapter 1

It had been three hours since the power had gone out leaving them all trapped on an elevator together, and Jane was starting to come apart at the seams.

Since the CIA she didn't do well in small enclosed spaces.

That was why, she made it a point to slip out of every brief and meeting early so she could take the stairs without holding up the team. She broke away almost as soon as they got into the building to book it up the stairs.

The team never noticed her absence or if they did they never said anything to her about it.

But today, she had been distracting, unfocused. Her brain still stuck on the faces of the children they'd rescued from a trafficking ring that day.

Memories of her childhood spring to the front of her mind making her wish for once that she'd never remembered them. Her mind churning, mixing the memories with the experiences of the present day until she could have sworn she'd seen Ian's face among the crowd and had picked herself up from the ground.

So, unlike normal, when the team had entered the building she'd simply followed. Until it had been too late for her to withdraw from the elevator without drawing attention to herself. Something she did her best to avoid.

Attention from the team these days came in glares, mistrust, and anger. Best to fly under the radar.

So she had sucked it up, berating herself for her mistake even as she stepped onto the elevator. Squeezing herself into the corner as far from the other three as she could. Counting down the seconds until they reached their floor.

But then four floors from theirs the elevator had jerked, sending Reade to the ground, and the lights had flickered.

They quickly discovered that the power to the whole building had been cut, and that Patterson had no idea when they would be rescued with everything going on.

Jane had managed to stay relatively unbothered as the team ignored her in favor of talking amongst themselves.

And for the first hour that had worked fine. But by the beginning of the second hour, the elevator had become a death trap.

Humidity and the increasing temperature nearly suffocating. Coupled with Jane's rising anxiety, she started to sweat through her shirt.

The others it seemed were not immune to the heat either, and she watched over the next hour as they steadily shed their clothing.

By the beginning of the current hour, Kurt and Reade had stripped down to wife beaters, socks and shoes discarded. She could tell that it wouldn't be long before they stripped down to their boxers. The image forced a smile out of her.

Zapata on the other hand had zero qualms about it, and stood proudly in a tiny tank and her underwear. Even then her hair was matted to her face, and sweat dripped noticeably down her neck.

Jane, however, had only removed her jacket. Her shoes, pants and long sleeve t-shirt remained on.

"Okay, Jane, what gives?" Zapata asked, breaking the silence between them all, her face serious, "It is literally a fucking sauna in here. You cannot tell me that you are comfortable in all that."

Jane just looked away, "I'm fine."

"Really?" Reade's asked, emboldened by Tasha's question, "Because I'm dying, and I'm wearing half what you are."

She didn't even know why they cared, "I'm fine, I'd rather not be half naked when they get us out of here," she tried to sound light, but she knew her voice pitched too high to be believable. The pounding in her chest only increased, sweat had long ago stuck her hair to the back of her neck, trapping the heat there.

She just wanted to get off this fucking elevator, she didn't need the team cornering her. She was only just controlling her anxiety as is.

"It's not like we haven't seen it all before," Zapata told her, Jane thought she might have been trying for funny but it came off sounding more bitchy than anything.

Not that the woman was wrong, they'd spend months looking at every inch of her body for clues. But that had been months ago, before the CIA had gotten their hands on her. They wouldn't want to see her body now.

"Why do you care?" She asked the woman honestly, hoping to get her to drop the subject.

That seemed to throw her off, but not for as long as Jane had hoped. "To be honest, you look miserable, and who knows how long we're going to be in here. Plus," Zapata stated with a shrug of her shoulders, "If you pass out we'll have to deal with it."

That at least made sense to Jane, because when had they cared for Jane's comfort? She doubted it had crossed their minds since her return.

"I won't pass out," She replied simply. She'd gone longer without water to drink in worse conditions.

Weller seeming to sense the growing tension between the two women, spoke up for the first time, "Jane, are you sure? Tasha's right, it's hot in here and we more than likely have hours till we get out. We just want you to be comfortable."

"I'm fine, just drop it," This time Jane couldn't keep the anger out of her voice. They didn't get to do this. Pretend to care. She didn't owe them anything, not an explanation or a reaction.

"Whatever, burn up then," Zapata growled, rolling her eyes as she turned so her back was to Jane. She felt Wellers eyes on her for a few minutes, but eventually his attention shifted. Reade had simply been pulled in by Zapata.

It was better this way, she thought as she slide down to sit on the ground in her corner.

She didn't know how much time had passed, but the team's voices had eventually become nothing but background noise. Her heart beat accelerating more and more the longer they sat in this box. Her head swam as she closed her eyes. Just for a moment.

Just for a second. She just needed a break from this never ending cycle of anxiety and upset. The heat starting to get to her.

But she didn't want to be weak.

She barely noticed her heart beat slowing or her lungs straining to fill and empty as the blackness welcome her.

She felt something sting her face, and she sluggishly forced her eyes open. Kurt knelt in front of her, his mouth moving but she couldn't hear what he was saying.

She tried to bring her hands up to push him away when he shook her, mouth still moving, but she found her limps heavy and unwilling to move.

She felt more hands on her, she tried to struggle but it felt feeble.

Kurt grabbed her face, and made her look at him, she struggled to focus on what he must have been saying.

"Jane"

"Jane please," She nodded, only just grasping his words, "We need to get you out of these clothes, you passed out from heat exhaustion, okay?"

Even in her sluggish state she felt fear grip her heart, and she struggled to make words.

"What is it Jane?" Kurt asked, his voice still sounding so distant.

"Please-don't," She managed to whisper.

"I'm sorry Jane, but we have to," He replied, and she felt him lifting her up. She assumed it was Reade or Zapata who fingered the bottom of her shirt, pulling up over her head. She closed her eyes. She didn't want to see their reactions.

But she heard someone's breath hiss between their teeth, as if they'd sucked it in too quickly.

"Oh my god, Jane," She heard Zapata gasp behind her.

She knew what they were seeing, and it disgusted her as much as she knew it disgusted them. Her tattoos had been one thing, but at least in some way the artist in her could see their beauty. Now scars, thick and thin cut through them. Ruining whatever beauty they may have had. Hot metal, knives, and electrical currents had all left their marks on her torso. Cigarettes and leather had burnt their legacies into her arms.

"Jane, open your eyes," She heard the concern in Kurt's voice and she forced herself to obey despite what she feared she'd find when she met his gaze.

"Someone, get Patterson on the phone, we need to get her out of here," Kurt demanded, "Tasha, help me get her out of her pants, she's still burning up."

This time she just turned her gaze to the ceiling and ignored the humiliation burning through her. At this point it didn't matter if they saw it all. She didn't matter to them. She wondered if they'd feel happy to see that she had been punished so thoroughly for her hand in Mayfair's death. Or if they would feel it hadn't been enough.

She certainly did.

She zoned out again.

She came back in, to the sight of the elevator doors being pulled open and paramedics streaming in.

Her head lolled to the side, and the last thing she saw before her vision went dark again was Kurt's face. She thought he looked concerned but it may have been a trick of the light.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys,

Glad to see that so many of you are interested in this new story! Thank you for all the reviews, faves, and follows! You guys warm my heart!

Just to make sure we all stay on the same page, there will be a lot of angstyness in this story! So, buckle your seat belts and get ready for the ride, okay? :)

This chapter will feature the teams POV, and next chapter we will hear from Jane again!

Anyway, enough of my blabbering!

Hope you enjoy this chapter,

Lots of love,

-Fallen

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

After the EMT carted Jane out of the elevator, the rest of them were left standing there in shock, still processing everything that had just happened. Who knows how long they would have stood there unable to look at each other if it hadn't of been for Patterson's arrival.

"What happened? Is everyone okay? I heard over the radio that they called an ambulance?" Patterson didn't even seem to take a breath as she berated them with one question after another, "Wait, where's Jane? Oh God, it was her wasn't it? She's the one they called the ambulance for. What happened?" She didn't say it but they all heard the silent _what did you do_ , attached to the end of that.

Kurt finally took the wheel, "Patterson, Jane is on her way to the hospital now: she passed out from heat exhaustion. We don't think she drank or ate much today, and so she wasn't able to cope with the heat. Get us up to date on what happened today and then we can all go to the hospital."

Patterson nodded, but then looked at them in confusion and possibly anger, "Why didn't any of you go with her?"

"They didn't want us to crowd her," Kurt told her, hands up to placate her. Patterson could be the sweetest person on the earth but if she thought you'd fucked up. Well his only advice would be to run because she would hound you to the ends of the earth.

She just looked at them like they were stupid for a second before shaking her head, "Okay then, well, you guys ended up stuck in the elevator because we had a freak power surge that knocked out all our systems. Thankfully, we were able to get everything back online, and it looks like nothing significant was damaged. So, we're in the clear at the moment, it's going to take them until at least tomorrow morning to get all systems up and running the way they should. So, the director is sending all non-tech people home,"

"So you're staying here then?" Zapata asked.

"Hell no, I'm coming with you guys to go check on Jane. I did my part getting everything back on line in the first place, the basement gremlins can polish it all off." Patterson told her with a smirk, before turning on her heels and starting towards the stairs. When they didn't immediately followed, she turned back to look at them, "Well, are you coming?"

Kurt almost laughed at the way all of them immediately rushed to follow her, but the image of Jane passed out in the elevator still lingered too close to the surface for him to enjoy the moment. He didn't even let himself think of the scars that had been revealed when they stripped her of her shirt and pants in an attempt to cool her down.

He had known logically that she'd been with the CIA for three months but to see the evidence up close. It turned his stomach just thinking about it.

Now he almost wished Jane hated them because they had thrown her to the sharks without a second thought. Yet, even now she did nothing but work to earn their trust back. And they'd let her. Acting like she owed them.

When it seemed now that they owed her.

The thoughts kept him preoccupied on the drive there, and if it hadn't of been for Patterson he doubted anyone would have spoken. He wondered if they were all thinking about the same things he was.

By the time he parked he had to resist the urge to run into the hospital. Instead, he waited patiently for the team get out, and they walked into the emergency room entrance together.

"Excuse me, ma'am, one of my agent came in here about thirty minutes ago."

The woman looked up at him, her face the perfect mask of indifference, "Name?"

"Jane Doe," Kurt told her, he could hear Zapata's fingers tapping on the counter to his left. He doubted that would make the woman move any faster but if it made her feel better.

"Are you serious?" the woman asked, "Jane Doe?"

"Yes, he's serious, now tell us where she is," Zapata snapped at the woman, her fingernails still clicking against the counter.

The woman rolled her eyes, and started typing into her computer, "Okay, I have her here, looks like she was admitted 45 minutes ago, and she's in a room upstairs. Are any of you family or emergency contact? I can give you room information but I can't release any medical information."

Kurt nodded, "I should be listed as her medical emergency, Kurt Weller," At least he had been before Jane had been arrested. But he doubted she'd thought to change it.

The woman nodded, "Okay, well it looks like they're treating her for dehydration, and malnutrition. The doctor upstairs should have more information to give you, 2nd floor room 2102."

 _Malnutrition?_ The dehydration he understood, but the others were news to him. He glanced at the team, and he could tell they were as shocked as him.

But he needed to see Jane now, to see with his own eyes that she's okay, "Come on, let's go."

By the time they got to the second floor, the tension between them all had become almost stifling. Funny, how all of them except maybe Patterson had treated Jane like the enemy since her return, but now all of them were equally agitated at her injury.

"We'll check on her first, and then I'll try to find a doctor to speak to," Kurt informed them, as they searched for Jane's room.

He stopped a passing nurse, "We're looking for room 2102?"

She smiled at him, "Just keep going straight, take the first hallway on your left and it will be the first door on your right, okay?"

He nodded, releasing her arm, and following her directions team still on his heels.

"Do you think she'll be awake? You guys said she was unconscious, right?" Patterson asked as they walked.

"I don't know, she seemed pretty out of it when they took her," Reade told her quietly.

"Yeah, she said something to Kurt but then it looked like she passed out again," Zapata confirmed.

Kurt remained quiet, he'd done all the talking he wanted to do until he saw Jane.

Finally they arrived at the room they'd been told belonged to Jane, but Kurt felt himself freeze. He wanted to know but suddenly he felt afraid to.

"Kurt?" Patterson's voice shook him from his trance, and he reached out a hand to knock.

A voice he didn't recognize told him to come in, and so he opened the door, holding it open for the team to enter besides him. He drew back the curtain, and immediately noticed the woman in scrubs standing beside Jane's bedside.

"Hi, I'm Karen Jane's nurse," The woman, Karen, told them as she walked across the room to shake all of their hands. "As you can see Jane's still out, but we've got her on fluids. She should wake up soon, you're all welcome to take a seat and wait if you like. I have to check on my other patients but I'll be back in to check on her within the hour."

"Thank you, it was nice to meet you," Patterson told the woman as she left, the rest of them echoing the sentiment.

After Karen left they all turned to look at Jane in unison, laying there in the hospital bed she looked so fragile, like a baby bird. Without her bulky jacket, and lose work clothing to hide under it seemed so painfully clear that she hadn't been eaten anywhere near enough.

How had they not noticed?

One by one the team took seats around Jane's bed, but Kurt couldn't do it. He just stood there, looking at her, trying to stare only at her face for any sign that she might be waking.

"I guess I always knew in the back of my head that terrible things had happened to Jane in those three months with the CIA. But when she came back she seemed, if not 100%, okay enough that I didn't really worry, ya know?" Patterson told them, her eyes ghosting over the vicious scars that burst through the tattoos on Jane's upper arms.

"Trust me, that's nothing," Zapata whispered, her face drawn. Kurt wondered if she felt as guilty right now as he did.

Patterson's eyes tore away from Jane's scars to look at Zapata, "What do you mean?"

Zapata looked away, "I-"

"We had to remove her shirt on the elevator, when we were trying to cool her down," Reade interjected, though his voice sounded as strained as Zapata had looked Kurt knew he'd jumped in to stop Zapata from having to say the words, "Her arms are practically a clean slate compared to the rest of her."

Kurt didn't want to hear it, he didn't want to remember looking down at Jane and seeing those horrible scars. Didn't want to think that in some he deserved the blame for them being there. If he hadn't of let the CIA take her, she wouldn't have ever been there.

But almost worse, he couldn't help but think, is that when she came back he did nothing to help her. He only hurt her more, and now it hurt to look at her.

"How did we let it come to this?" Patterson whispered, her blue eyes dark with sadness and upset as their words, and the picture in front of her slowly sunk in. "We used to be a family, didn't we?"

Kurt felt like the words were a punch in the gut. But he had no answer. Nothing he could say right now could fix the damage they'd done.

He heard Zapata choke on a sob, her hands coming up to shield her face from them, and Reade immediately leaned over to comfort her.

Kurt felt himself take a deep breath, "We can't change what's happened but we can change what we do from here on out."

Patterson nodded at him, her blue eyes lighter, "She deserves better. She does."

She didn't have to convince him, and he knew that Zapata and Reade felt the same.

He knew that they'd be having a meeting later to determine a plan of action. He doubted it would be as easy as simply saying sorry and moving on. No they'd truly fucked up.

But before he could get drawn too far into those thoughts, Jane groaned and immediately all attention went to her.

He watched as her eyelids fluttered, eyelashes brushing her cheekbones as she struggled to open her eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey guys,

I know it's been a while since I last updated and this is kind of a short update! But I'm in the midst of finals for nursing school. So to say things have been ABSOLUTELY crazy is pretty much the understatement of the century. As soon as finals are over I'm going to try to get back to updating a bit more regularly. I promise this story hadn't been forgotten or put aside.

Love,

Fallen

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Jane came to consciousness slowly. The pain in her head making her groan, as she struggled to comprehend her situation. The last thing she remembered was getting in the elevator with the team.

Jesus.

She felt like she'd been hit by a brick.

She tried to open her eyes, but glaring light forced her to halt the attempt.

"Jane, are you awake?" She heard someone, Patterson? Calling to her.

She groaned again, unable to force words out of her parched throat, and again she tried to open her eyes. This time she blinked rapidly against the light forcing herself to focus behind the starbursts that darted across her vision.

As her vision cleared, she took in her surroundings, _definitely in the hospital._ She surmised, taking in the equipment, the hospital gown, and her IV, before she turned her attention to the people surrounding her bed. She felt herself stiffen as she realized the whole team minus Naz stood around her bed.

Had she done something? She forced her aching brain to try to remember what had happened after she got off the elevator but all she could remember is being too hot.

Dr. Borden had told her that the blackouts she sometimes experienced were related to the anxiety spawning from her months with the CIA. But this was the first time she truly felt that she could remember absolutely nothing about the circumstances of her current situation since she stepped out of the bag in Times Square.

"What happened?" She rasped, looking at Patterson. At least Patterson and she were friendly. She might tell her the truth without making her feel like a criminal or the enemy. She knew the others would only want to interrogate her about whatever had landed her here.

"You passed out on the elevator," His voice immediately drew her eyes away from Patterson's, and she met Kurt's eyes for the first time in what felt like decades. These days it hurt to look at his face and see resentment where she used to see something more.

But today, he looked…concerned?

Ha her brain must be more damaged that she thought. He must be concerned about the mission. Concerned that whatever she'd done would make her unfit to help them.

"I-what?"

"We were stuck on the elevator for hours after the power went out, and you fainted from heat exhaustions," He told her again, his eyes searching her face but for what she didn't know.

Did he think she'd faked it? It wouldn't surprise her.

"We were worried Jane," She felt her heart stop when she realized Zapata had spoken to her, "One minutes you were fine and the next thing we knew you were on the ground."

Jane couldn't bring herself to meet the woman's eyes, so she dropped her gaze back to her lap, "I'm fine, I mustn't've drunken enough water."

They didn't need to pretend to be concerned.

"I can still do my job," She tried to assure them, but as she choked out the last word she started coughing. Each cough felt like a razor blade to her throat, but it was so dry she couldn't seem to stop.

Then she felt something press into her hands, and she opened her eyes long enough to see a cup of ice water. She quickly downed it, trying not to choke as her body tried to simultaneously swallow and cough.

When she finished the glass her body calmed down enough for her to continue talking, "I'll check myself out tonight, and be back in the office by tomorrow morning. You all didn't need to come here."

"Of course we did Jane, we're your friends," Patterson assured her.

Jane had to stop herself from laughing, _friends?_ They hadn't been friends since Kurt put those handcuffs on her wrists. Even Patterson, had only been civil with a touch of friendliness.

They didn't need to pretend to care to get her to do her job.

She couldn't stop herself from shaking her head as her brain worked through her reaction to Patterson's words, "No, you didn't, and honestly I'd prefer if you all left."

She risked a peak up to scan their faces, and felt shocked at the looks on all their faces. They looked almost hurt. Now she really didn't understand. They hadn't showed an ounce of care to her in the past months.

No reason for them to start now.

"Jane, I don't think you should be left alone-" Kurt started.

"Kurt, I'm an adult, I may work for you but you don't own me," She bit out, _not yet at least._

Patterson again tried to intervene, "We know Jane, we're just worried about you, the Doctor's say you haven't been eating enough. We just want to make sure you're okay."

"It's true Jane, after what happened on the elevator we only wanted to check on you," Reade spoke for the first time, and Jane felt her stomach twist when Zapata nodded looking as concerned as the rest of them.

This time Jane couldn't hold back, "I don't need your concern, I've had enough of it since I got back. So please just leave, I don't need any help or any pity. I've done just fine for myself, by myself."

When they made no moves to leave, Jane glared at them all, "Get out, you have no rights to be here against my will." She reached for the call bell as she spoke. Apparently they thought she'd fall into their arms at the first offer of compassion. Yeah, right.

She'd done it alone this far. She didn't need knights in shining armor to rescue her. She'd rescue herself just like she'd done the first time, and the second time, and every damn time since she'd been taken by the CIA.

"Jane please," Patterson pleaded.

Jane just shook her head, "I'll see you tomorrow."

She looked at them all, seeing the flabbergasted looks on their faces, and the way Kurt's face has screwed up like he was about to argue with her.

But before any of them could say a word, a nurse popped her head into the room, "Hello Ms. Doe, I didn't get a chance to introduce myself earlier, but how can I help you?"

"I'm not in the mood for visitors right now," Jane told the nurse firmly, and looked again at the team, "Can you please see that they leave?"

The nurse immediately walked fully into the room, her face serious, "I'm sorry agents, but if Ms. Doe doesn't want you here I'm going to need you to leave."

"Jane please, don't do this," Patterson pleaded, "We just want to help."

"It's a little late for your help now," Jane shot back, the pounding in her head only growing worse as the conversation continued. She didn't mean to direct it at Patterson, the only person to show her an ounce of kindness, but she wanted them gone. She knew as soon as they got back tomorrow it would be exactly like it had been.

She didn't want to try to adjust to something that wouldn't last.

"Please, just leave," Jane asked them, feeling the fight drain out of her. She just wanted them to go. She didn't need to be exposed or weak in front of them. Why give them another thing to lord over her?

"Fine, but this isn't over Jane," Somehow Kurt made it sound so ominous. She knew she would face some sort of consequences for landing herself in the hospital.

Patterson, and Zapata both shot her one last pleading look before they left the room. Reade had to grab Kurt and pull him out of the room. But they were finally gone.

"Ms. Doe, is there anything else I can do for you?"

Jane looked at the nurse, "Just get me discharge papers."

"Ms. Doe, we can't advise that you check yourself out, we still aren't even finished the IV fluid."

Jane just shook her head, "I don't care, I just want to leave, please."

"You understand that you'll be discharging against medical advice, correct?"

Jane nodded.

"I'll have to talk to the doctor, but if you're sure, I can't stop you." The nurse responded, though she sounded upset.

Forty Five minutes later Jane walked out of the hospital in a borrow pair of sweatpants and a hospital hoodie. She hailed a cap, and gave him her address. Thankfully she'd been able to get her wallet, and her keys from the hospital staff. Her clothes it seemed had been left at the FBI.

When she discovered that she felt her stomach drop. That must be why the team had been feigning concern. They'd finally seen what she'd been hiding since she got back.

Now they knew that her body was as ugly as her soul. Scarred and ruined.

She'd thought she hated her tattoos all those months ago when she'd walked out of that bag and into this life. But now that they'd been so thoroughly ruined she found herself wishing they'd remained untouched and untainted.

"We're here ma'am," The cabbies accented voice pulled her from her thoughts.

She just smiled awkwardly, and handed him a wad of bills as she stepped out of the cab. She walked up to her door, trying to ignoring the nagging dizziness and the increasing pounding of her headache.

She forced herself to open the door, and walk into her safe house.

But instead of feeling like she'd come home she only felt like she'd walked back into a prison.

She'd been here for months but the walls were as base as they'd been when Kurt had first shoved her through the door. The only furnishings were her bed in the upstairs bedroom, a small bedside table, a card table in the kitchen and a single chair. Plus the abundance of exercise equipment she'd acquired to return herself back to tip top shape.

The thought of climbing the stairs to her room sent her mind reeling. So she simply walked over the exercise matt that took up the majority of her living room, and collapsed.

Darkness took over within minutes, and she resigned herself to another night in hell.


	4. Chapter 4

Hey guys!

First I wanted to apologize for how long it's been since I last updated! I have been on vacation following a crazy semester of nursing school, and got to see my fiancé for the first time in almost five months. So I didn't do a lot of writing during that time. I promise updates should be much more frequent from now on!

Second, thank you again for all the continued support, you guys are amazing and I love you to pieces!

Now on to the story, which I'm sure is what you guys really care about!

Lots of love,

Fallen

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

The brutal buzzing of her alarm clock pulled her from sleep.

A groan escaped her mouth as she fought the pounding in her head to stretch out to silence her alarm. Her mouth felt like she'd been eating cotton balls, and as she struggled to push herself to her feet she regretted checking herself out of the hospital so early.

But she couldn't afford anymore weakness. The team had seen enough already.

Her legs shook as she finally regained her feet, but she forced herself to cross the living room and enter the kitchen. She immediately found a glass on the counter and filled it with tap water. She downed it and two others before she felt remotely human again.

She limbs still shook but she forced herself to set her forth glass down half way empty. Then she made her way into the living room and forced herself to begin her morning exercise routine.

She no longer believed in excuses. She couldn't afford to be less than her best at any given moment.

By the time she finished her eyesight felt blurry and the pounding in her head nearly deafened her. But she allowed herself another glass of water before she pushed herself up the stairs to shower and get ready for work.

For once she got into the car with her detail. Usually she walked to work or took a taxi but today she didn't want to deal with strangers any more than she had to.

They rode to the office in silence, but she saw more than one concerned look shot her way. She did her best to be polite and kind to the men on her detail. She couldn't imagine they enjoyed following her around everywhere and at times they almost felt like friends.

But at the moment she couldn't handle concern so she ignored them.

As they pulled up and exited the vehicle her stomach rumbled ominously and she remembered that it had been almost a full day since she'd eaten something.

"Do you want to stop by the cafeteria on our way up ma'am?" Jared, who had been on her original detail asked.

She knew they'd arrived more than early enough, she liked to beat Kurt to the office, so the clock had only just turned to 6. But still she shook her head, "No, thank you though."

She didn't know how much her stomach would be able to handle after the events of yesterday. It wasn't as if she'd never gone hungry before.

So she'd go with the devil she knew rather than face the uncertainty of the alternative. The last thing she needed was for the team to see her running to the bathroom if her stomach decided it couldn't handle whatever she managed to eat.

For the rest of the journey up to the office they walked in silence. Jane did her best to mask the way her breath labored as they walked up the stairs. Usually she could make it up all fifteen flights without a problem, but by the fifth flight she felt out of breath. Her vision tunneling until she could see only a few feet in front of her.

She could have cried by the time she finally saw the sign for the fifteenth floor. She allowed herself a moment to breathe before she pushed the door open. She'd arrived almost an hour and half before the time they were expected to be in the office. So she hoped she'd have a clear path to her desk in the corner.

She'd found that the team tended to completely overlook her presence as they funneled in, and if they didn't have a case she could go the whole day without being noticed or acknowledged. She had never been able to decide how she felt about it. But today she felt grateful. She could only hope that the pattern continued.

Though she knew that Kurt would be lurking throughout the day waiting to catch her alone and ream her out for passing out. She'd long learned to tune out his rants and rampages. Between Naz and him she'd discovered she merely needed to look chastised and nod as they spoke to end it quickly.

Just like with the CIA they didn't need her to respond to punish her. Nor did they want rationales or reasons. They'd come into the room knowing exactly what she'd done wrong or right and how they were going to handle it.

She had no say in anything.

"Ma'am?"

She forced herself to smile at him, and walk out of the doorway and to her desk. Thankfully the lights were off in the Kurt's office, and the other desks unoccupied.

She gave the four men in her detail a small wave as they dispersed to wherever they went in the building while she worked, and then she sat down. As soon as they were out of sight she practically collapsed against the back of her desk. Even with her eye closed the room felt like it was swimming and the pounding in her head seemed endless.

She hated herself for the weakness, and loathed herself even more for allowing the situation yesterday to happen. If she hadn't of been so distracted she never would have ended up on that elevator to begin with.

The team might have noted her absence in the after, but she doubt they would have questioned her about it. They never had before at least, and as long as she'd ended up upstairs with Patterson during the blackout they would have had no reason to this time.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

She continued to berate herself until the dizziness subsided enough for her to open her eyes. She needed to get her paperwork done. Now.

Maybe if she had everything done and ready for Kurt by the time he got in the office he would forget to be angry at her. Even better if it was done and on his desk so he didn't have to look at her. She knew he hated having a reminder of everything that had happened so close to him every day.

She took a deep breath, and forced herself to turn on her computer and get to work despite the ever growing pain in her head. Wearily she worked her way through the paperwork from the case they closed yesterday. Then she forced herself to fill out an incident report about what had happened in the elevator.

Though the images on the computer had long since gone blurry, she relied on her muscle memory and spell check as she trudged through.

By the time she finished, she'd nearly eaten up the entire hour and a half she had before Kurt and the others would begin to stream in. So she printed everything as fast as she could and practically ran to Kurt's office to drop everything off on his desk. She made sure not to linger, the last thing she needed is for someone to catch her in his office without him.

She'd only just sat down at her desk, resisting the urge to rest her head in her hands as the dizziness spiked again after her race to the office and back, when the elevator dinged and Kurt walked in accompanied by Naz.

Even in her addled state she noted that they seemed distant, a cold air in the way they stood, especially compared to their normal entrance. She'd learned weeks ago to smother any lingering hurt when she saw them together.

She'd never really had a shot at the future with Kurt she dreamed about.

People like her didn't get happy ending.

They only got pain and unmarked graves. She should know. She'd dug a few herself.

Images of Oscar, and the feel of his blood on her hands tore through her. Tears building up in her eyes as she fought to push away the very thought of him.

She forced herself to look away and squint at the computer in front of her as she regained her composure. When she felt his gaze rove across the room and settle on her it took all her will power not to tense up. Her mind already running through all the possible things he'd say to her.

She knew he'd question her commitment to the mission. Her adequacy at doing her job and her dedication to the cause. Then he'd berate her for being irresponsible, and for the attitude she'd given them yesterday in the hospital room. He'd remind her that she belonged to the FBI and Naz would find a way to insinuate that defective product got sent back to the CIA. Where they would truly break her and squeeze every last piece of knowledge out of her.

But what she least looked forward to, would be the inevitable sense of betrayal and the lack of trust in her that would be conveyed. The ever bitterer reminder that she no longer belonged. That they no long cared about her outside of what she could do for them.

The reminder that she was alone in this world.

And yet no words came. He didn't bark her name and demand she meet him in his office. Nor did Naz's cold voice slither across the room to beckon her to them. Instead silence reigned, and the sound of his footsteps told her that he'd moved to his office. Naz's heels clicked in the opposite direction, more than likely headed to her little alcove adjacent to Patterson's office.

She dared a peak a full five minutes after his office door had closed, and found him sitting at his desk staring at her paperwork looking utterly…confused? Upset? She couldn't read his face from a distance but he didn't look happy.

Had she not done it right? She wracked her brain trying to think of where she might have gone wrong, but as far as she knew everything had been done to normal specifications. In fact, she tended to be more detailed than the average agent.

The sound of the elevator arriving on the floor distracted her from further contemplation and she looked up as Zapata, Reade, and Patterson all arrived together. A frumbled looking Dr. Borden trailing behind them.

Though they were talking, all of them seemed more serious than normal, she wondered what they had been discussing. Even Dr. Borden appeared to be participating in whatever conversation they were having, but he seemed harried as if they were pestering him about something he didn't feel comfortable discussing. Though she could tell he at least wanted to participate, maybe they were discussing a case or a patient?

She could tell the exact moment they all realize she sat at her desk, because they all immediately stopped talking. Not an unfamiliar reaction but still it stung.

What happened next though didn't fit the normal script.

"Jane, what are you doing here?" Patterson asked, her face seemingly overcome with anxiety, "Shouldn't you still be at the hospital?"

She hadn't expected them to talk to her, they never did, so it took her a second to formulate a response, "I-I-they let me out last night," she mumbled, averting her eyes and hoping the conversation would end there.

"Did Kurt let you come back?" Zapata asked, interrupting whatever Patterson had been about to say. Jane forced herself to meet the Hispanic woman's eyes, the anger there didn't surprise her, but she had thought Zapata would expect her to be back. Unless she thought Kurt would suspend her. Is that what they had been discussing?

"He didn't say I couldn't come in," She answered, trying her best not to make any indication that they hadn't had the chance to talk.

"Are you serious? He should have told you to stay home, you shouldn't be pushing yourself after what happened yesterday!" Zapata practically spat, before she started towards Kurt's office looking not unlike a bull about to charge.

Now she truly felt confused, why would Zapata care? For the matter why would any of them?

"Don't worry about Zapata, Jane, she's just worried about you. Are you sure you should be in right now? You still look a little pale, and you really should still be resting." Patterson piped up again, looking concerned for her, as if Jane had become her friend again in some bizarre scenario.

"Have you eaten already? I'm heading down to grab coffee and donuts for everyone," Reade asked her, now officially throwing this day into the twilight zone.

She hadn't but she shook her head, "I'm fine, thank you though. I have to get back to work though," she told them gesturing to her computer with a flippant motion as if to say what can you do.

Patterson looked as if she wanted to say something else, but Jane forced her gaze down to her computer. She didn't understand what was happening, and she wanted it to be done. Even though she hated the new normal, she hated change more, and since she didn't know why they were acting this way she would ignore it.

By tomorrow everything would be exactly as it had been. She'd go back to being the reject, the one that none of them wanted there or trusted. They'd go back to the perfect, happy little family they'd always been, and they'd forget about everything about yesterday. Forget her moment of weakness. Forget her.

She heard Patterson sigh, and then exchange some hushed words with Reade, before they both wondered away. And distantly she heard what sounded like raised voices coming from Kurt's office but she did her best not to react to it.

All the tension seemed to only increase her headache, and she found that she could barely read the words in front of her. She grabbed one of the water bottle's she stashed under her desk and made herself drink it.

"Jane, come here," She set down her water, her time had finally come, and forced herself to stand up. She watched Zapata walked out of Kurt's office looking smug, and felt her heart sink just a little further. Now she was really in for it.

She gave herself a full thirty seconds to overcome the dizziness that hit as soon as she stood, and then she started towards Kurt office. Just as in the stairwell early that morning, she felt light headed and weak. But she soldiered on.

By the time she reached Kurt's office, and brushed by him to enter she felt like any second she might pass out. Still she made sure to keep herself collected, ignoring the sweat beading at the back of her neck and gathering on her palms as she sat down in front of his desk.

She waited for the dressing down to begin, she'd learned months ago not to try to say anything before he did. It only meant that she would get it even worse. In fact the more she talked in general the worse it ended up. Best just to sit and take it.

But when he came to lean against the desk in front of her, he looked more worried than angry.

"Jane, why did you come in today? Last I heard from the hospital they were supposed to keep you overnight for observation." He asked her almost gently, but right then she knew she'd been caught. If she lied and said they'd released her early she'd be in trouble. But wasn't that what he wanted? For her to stop pretending to be sick, and to be a productive member of the team.

She felt confused, and the pounding in her head made it impossible for her to think.

"Jane?"

She refocused, making herself look up at him, "I wanted to get the paperwork done, and I didn't want to miss anything important so I checked myself out." She didn't bother to tell him that she hated hospital. That they made her nightmares even worse. He wouldn't care.

"You checked yourself out?" Now he did look angry. But she didn't know why. Did he want to be there?

"Yes?" She asked, hoping he would explain himself.

"Jane, you passed out yesterday, you almost had a heat stroke. You should have stayed there and let them make sure you were okay. We all needed to know that you're okay first, paperwork could have waited and nothing that might have happened today is more important than your heath." She could tell that he'd wanted to say more, but he stopped and took a breath as if collecting himself, "Jane, you're important to us, and seeing you like that yesterday scared us. Now you're here looking like death warmed over when you should be in the hospital recovering."

Where was this coming from? They cared about her? Since when.

"They weren't going to do anything but give me more fluids. The stay was already expensive enough, I was only begin logical," She retorted, patience wearing thin. She'd prepared to be lectured and berated but about something that made sense not this.

"Jane that's not logical, you have to take care of yourself," And now they'd gotten to the heart of the issue, they needed her in tip top shape, he didn't really care, as she suspected, "Since you've already completed your paperwork I think you should go home early and try to get some rest."

She started to protest but he put his hand up, "I'm serious Jane, go home, I already called your detail they're getting your stuff and taking you home."

She stood and robotically walked out of the office. He'd actually sent her home. Didn't he know that nothing waited for her there but nightmares and her own thoughts? She never could decide which was worse. It seemed awake or asleep her mind did nothing but torture her.

Just as she reached the door he said one last thing, "Jane, this is for your own good, we just want you to get better. I know it hasn't seemed like it, but we do care."

She just kept walking, better to pretend she hadn't heard, and so she let herself go on auto pilot. Following her detail woodenly until they got back to her safe house.

As soon as she got inside her safe house and locked the door she collapsed. Giving into the feeling that had hung over her since she woke up.

She kicked off her shoes, and again crawled to the matt in the corner of her room and curled up.

She thought about forcing herself to eat or to drink more water but she found she didn't have the energy. Instead she shut her eyes and welcomed the darkness.

Tomorrow she wouldn't allow them to send her home. Tomorrow she'd be useful once again. Tomorrow she'd prove herself untouchable, unstoppable. Tomorrow she'd be strong.

But today, today she'd be weak just for this moment.

Today she'd let the demons win.

Already she felt the nightmares coming. She'd gotten a reprieve last night but she'd known it would never last.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Okay guys, next chapter is going to be the teams point of view predominantly, you'll get the chance to see what's going on in their heads and what they plan to do about everything they've seen. You're still going to get some Jane moments, but I just want you to know that her inner dialogue is going to get darker before it gets brighter. She's absolutely not in a good place, and she is not just going to get to a better one if the team shows her some consideration. If anything she's going to be suspicious and unwilling to accept their sudden change of attitude.

NOW POLL TIME!

Two things for you guys:

Would you guys like Kurt to come to check on Jane and find her on the floor: Yes or no

Also, who would you like to see Jane have a moment with next chapter: (aside from Kurt) Patterson, Zapata, or Reade.


	5. Chapter 5

**!**

 **Sorry tis been so long, first vacation, and now I'm back in school! My life has been an absolute shit show the last few weeks! But hopefully this update makes up for it even a little bit!**

 **Again thank you for all your amazing reviews, follows, and favorites! You guys make my life so much better! Things haven't been great lately, and it's always lovely to read your encouraging words!**

 **So much love,**

 **Fallen**

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Kurt watched Jane leave, and couldn't help the sick sensation of worry that settled heavy in his stomach. He knew something was wrong with her but he no longer knew how to help. If it had been months ago, before the betrayal, both hers and his, he'd have this figured out already.

But now, he didn't even know how to talk to her without setting her guard up. Something he had only himself to blame for.

He couldn't shake the image of her eyes, so confused at the thought that they might care about her at all. As if she no longer thought of herself as human. She thought they'd value paperwork, over her health, as if she were a tool to them.

Then again, what actions of theirs had shown her that she wasn't just a tool?

He wracked his brain but all he could think of were all the moments they'd done their best to crush her. Every moment he, Zapata, hell even Reade had taken the opportunity to remind her exactly what they thought of her.

When had he let it get so bad?

Hell, Jane had come to him, only a few weeks ago begging for him to take a chance on her brother. The only person in her life that she had any true connection to. What had he done? He'd practically spat in her face, insisting that he didn't matter. That he wasn't worth the risk.

Now he could picture her face so clearly in that moment. What made him sickest wasn't the hurt or sadness on her face but the resignation, as if she had known walking in that they wouldn't help her but she'd tried anyway.

God, he'd become no better than the people who hurt her. They had at least been doing their jobs, no matter how much they enjoyed it. And hadn't he, gotten some remote pleasure out of hurting her, making her feel the pain she'd made him feel all those months ago. Never giving her a chance to explain herself, or letting the explanations she did give sink in. Instead he insisted that she'd been nothing but a snake in the water from the beginning.

When in his heart, he knew she hadn't been, and hearing her explain that first day he'd known. But he didn't want to acknowledge that he might have sent an innocent to hell.

Because that's exactly what he'd done. He'd let them take her, without saying a word, never checking on her or searching for her. Three months they'd had her, and god knows how much longer they might have had her if she hadn't escaped.

Then they'd hunted her down like an animal, and dragged her right back into the fight. They'd never asked how she'd been handling what happened to her. Never said a word when she came into work each day looking tired, exhausted, battered even. Or commented on the way her eyes always darted to the exits, the way she had to have her back against the wall or she looked almost wild. Never commented on how little she ate, or how thin she'd become.

Instead they reminded her again and again what a monster she'd been.

"Kurt?" He hadn't even heard his office door open, but he looked up to see Patterson standing in the door way her face drawn.

"Yes Patterson?" He asked, gesturing for her to come in and take a seat in front of him, "Is there a case?"

She shook her head, coming over to sit down, but sitting at the very edge of the seat as if she might bolt any second, "Is Jane alright? She looked pretty bad when she left."

He sighed, a hand coming up to rub his face before he looked at her, "I don't know Patterson, I think she might be a lot worse than we imagined."

"What are we going to do?" Patterson asked him, looking to him as if he held all the answers. As if he were the hero of the tale, with a fell swoop of his sword he'd right all the wrongs in the world for her. God, if only it were that easy.

"I don't know, Patterson, I-we've done so much damage I don't know where we go from here," he confided in her, something about her big blue eyes made it impossible to lie to her.

She nodded, as if she'd expected that answer even if she didn't want to hear it, "I think it's going to take a lot of work, but don't give up Kurt. We're going to figure this out, all of us, and we're going to help her get better. I think the trust between us all is damaged but the only way to fix it is to try."

She seemed to hesitate but then she continued, "I know things have been tense, especially between Jane, you, Zapata and Reade, but I think you guys can turn it around. I think Jane needs us to prove to her again that we do trust her, that we do want to help her and not just because we need her to take down Sandstorm. But because she's our friend. I think we forgot that somewhere down the line, but we need to remember it now. Or else we may lose her."

He could tell the words hit her as hard as they hit him, because even in his worst moments he'd never imagined a world where she didn't exist in it somewhere. But after the last few days, he'd started to see just how close to the edge the dark haired woman really stood, "I know Patterson, but figuring out how to start is going to be the hardest part. So far, everything we've done only seems to push her further away."

"Well, you have to see it from her point of view, for the last few months all we've done is hurt her, Whether we meant to or not, and then suddenly we're all acting concerned, trying to be her friends, asking her what's wrong, offering to be there for her. That has to seem fake, and knowing Jane, especially how Jane's been since she got back, all she can see is ulterior motives."

He nodded, he understood what she'd said but that didn't make it any clearer. Where did they go from here? How did they repair what they'd damaged?

It was clear they needed a team meeting, one that possibly included Borden. So they could best decide how to begin.

He called Reade, and Zapata into the room and paged Borden. As long as they didn't have a case pop up, they would have some time to discuss the matter. To try to figure out what they needed to do to bridge the gap, and help Jane heal from the trauma she'd experienced.

When he had everyone in his office, he realized he hadn't thought to include Naz, but in the same moment he knew she didn't belong here. This had to be their team, and no one else. Jane and Naz had never grown on each other, and he doubted Naz cared about Janes mental state. As long as she got things done, Naz wouldn't care if she lived or died in the end.

He took a second to take stock of the room, Dr. Borden had settled into the corner of the room, his eyes flickering around the room to take in everyone in the same way Kurt was doing now. His foot hammering against the floor in a steady, slightly high tempo, beat. He couldn't help wondering what had the doctor feeling anxious.

But he moved on, taking in Reade who leaned against the wall on the far right of the office, looking slightly confused. From the beginning, Reade had been the one to doubt Jane, but by the end Kurt thought the two had developed something of a quiet friendship. He'd heard more than one mention of nights out at a bar between the two of them, and apparently they both had a lust for trivia games.

Zapata sat herself sat rail straight in one of the two chairs in front of his desk, and after the dressing down he'd received from her earlier today he wasn't surprised to find her expression stormy. She'd surprised him the most, in how concerned she'd been since Jane had been taken away by the ambulance. He wondered if she, like him, felt guilty for her actions and words now that she'd seen the extent of the damage. But she also looked like she'd come to the meeting prepared. A woman on a mission.

Patterson just looked worried, her blue eyes scanning his face from her seat across from him, and he could tell she wanted this to get on with.

"I brought you all here today to talk about Jane," Kurt told them all solemnly.

"I do hope you all understand I cannot divulge any of what's happened during Jane's sessions. Unless she's threatening harm to herself or another doctor patient's confidentiality protects our sessions," Dr. Borden looked uneasy, and Kurt could tell he thought they were trying to harm Jane not help her.

"We understand that Dr. Borden, but we brought you here not to rat her out. But to help us discover the best way to help Jane," Kurt told him confidently.

Dr. Borden nodded, "I can do my best to help you, but I won't like there's a lot of unresolved trauma. And I can only help you so much."

Kurt understood, he hadn't expected the doctor to make things easy, only easier than they might be without him.

"Understood, now I'm hoping that we can talk through ways to bring her back into the fold. As you all have seen in the last two days," Or the last three months, "Jane doesn't appear to be coping well, if at all, with what's happened to her. We haven't exactly made that easy-"

"Yeah I'd say, we've done the exact opposite of making it easy," Zapata snapped, something close to a laugh clawing out of her throat, "We've done nothing but rub salt in her wounds since day one."

"Tasha," Reade started but she quickly interrupted him.

"No, we don't get to make excuses. I don't get to make excuses, I've done nothing but be a bitch to her since she got back. I wanted to make her feel as terrible and alone as we felt. I didn't want to see or imagine what those three months had been like for her. We don't get to pretend like we were just not helpful, when we actively made things worse for her." By the end Zapata was almost panting, and she looked sick to her stomach.

Kurt couldn't help but feel the same.

"If I may," Dr. Borden's calm voice washed over the room, "this isn't going to help Jane. All of you were dealing with various traumas. No one has been without mistake, including Jane, but rehashing it won't change what's already done. I suggest channeling those feelings into something productive."

"And what do you suggest Doc?" Zapata practically snarled.

"I think the best thing you all can do, is quietly begin to reassure her that you care. Not overtly, with questions or commentary but with actions. Include her in your conversations, trust her to watch your back without comment. Bring her a coffee or invite her out to drinks. The things you would do with a friend, a colleague, someone you trust, but without drawing attention to it. Jane doesn't trust us, I don't think she trusts anyone if I'm being honest, but she'll trust you less if you make a spectacle of things."

Kurt thought that would be a good start to things, and that seemed to be what they needed to focus in. They spent the next two hours talking about their plans, their strategy, and by the end he felt better about things.

He still didn't feel settled. Probably wouldn't until he felt that things between they were fixed, but he felt like he had a plan.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Hours had past before Jane manage to force herself off the mat. She'd been exiled from the office, at a little after ten, and now it was almost 4 in the afternoon.

She picked up her phone, and called her local delivery place, ordering some soup, rice and the spiciest chicken dish they had on the menu. She'd found since she'd come back from the CIA that she didn't taste things the way she used to.

Apparently that happened when you were electrocuted repeatedly.

Just another thing that would never be the same after what she'd been through. Another permanent reminder that she wouldn't ever be normal again.

As if her broken, scarred body wasn't enough.

She flicked on the small TV that stood in the corner of the room, and settled on the matt again, this time leaning against the wall so that she had a clear site line to the exits.

She flicked the channel until she found something bright and animated. No doubt a children's show, but they seemed to be the only things she could trust these days. She'd learned about triggers after the fifth time something she'd chosen to watch had sent her down the rabbit hole.

So she resigned herself to the silly animations that relied on physical humor, and childish antics to garner laughs.

She barely paid attention to the words, instead letting the artist in her enjoy the animation, the variety of which still amazed her. She'd tried to draw something similar once or twice, but every time she tried her hands painted her worst nightmares instead.

The one true escape she'd had before had turned against her too.

Some time later the door bell rang, and she got up to retrieve the food she'd order. Ignoring the way her stomach twisted at the smell of what lay in the bag.

These days almost everything she ate ended up coming back up before the nights end. So, she stopped caring about what went in.

She settled back down on the matt, and forced herself to consume the entirety of the bag in front of her. Even as the hot liquid of the soup drowned her, and the sticky rice clung to her throat choking her with each swallow.

At least the tangy burn of the chicken distracted her temporarily from the feel of it slithering down her throat.

Still she couldn't afford not to finish it. She'd denied her body food for long enough, and she knew she would need her strength in the coming days.

She wouldn't allow herself another moment like two days ago. Wouldn't allow them to see her at anything less than a hundred percent again.

She'd just finished eating when a knock sounded at the door. Immediately she felt herself tense up. Nobody ever came to visit her, and her detail would have called her name before knocking. They'd learned that after she'd shoved a gun in their faces on one of the first nights she'd been allowed back in the safe house after her return.

She hadn't moved when the knock sounded again, this time with a little more force, as if the person wanted to make sure they'd been heard.

She got to her feet carefully, tiptoeing across the room so that they wouldn't hear her movement across the barren wood floors.

By the time she reached the door her heart hammered in her chest, and adrenaline sparked through her veins. Filling her with an energy she hadn't felt in days.

Just she reached up to look into the peep hole, the knock sounded again, nearly startling her out of her skin. Though she managed to suppress the urge the shriek, instead she looked through the peep hole. Already ready for a fight.

Instead she felt her mouth fall open, what were they doing here?

She wracked her brain for some reason why they might be standing outside her door, and she could think of nothing. Had she done something?

None of them had visited her since her return. Why would one of them do so now?

She felt her hands shaking as she slowly pulled open the door, and stood facing the person who'd become a stranger, standing on her stoop.

"What are you doing here?" She forced herself to ask as calmly as she could.

They just stood there, and then as if shaking themselves out of a trace they help up a small bag, "I thought I'd bring dinner by and check on you."

All of the sudden she felt sheepish, "I just ate…" she trailed off looking at them more carefully.

"Oh, then can I come in? I grabbed a dessert too, you could eat that while I eat the rest?"

She didn't know why but she found herself nodding. Even as uncertainty continued to buzz in her brain, why had they come? Why would they check on her? What did they have to gain from doing so?

She didn't know, but suddenly she craved company. Suddenly she didn't want to be alone. She could question everything later. Right now having someone else be there to chase away the silence might be nice.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

 **Sorry guys! I promise next chapter you'll know who came by to check on her! Couldn't help myself and had to give you a little mystery!**

 **I know it might seem a little out of character, but the way I look at it Jane is absolutely traumatized. Sometimes she's going to lash out, other times she's going to desperately want something to cling to. I think people going through trauma, of any kind, let alone what she's gone through, never react as clean cut as they do on TV.**

 **So hopefully yall can work with me on that!**

 **Love,**

 **Fallen**


	6. Chapter 6

Hey ya'll

This is just a short little chapter to let you know that I haven't forgotten this story either! I promise the next chatper will be considerably longer but I just wanted to get something down for you all after all these months!

BUT I KNOW, you guys are going to totally hate me for the person I chose to be the one at the door! But I just couldn't justify in my head it being Kurt! Since things between them are so undefined and so tense I just felt if it were him my muse would bring me in a negative direction. I want them to have a slow burn return to where they were. To me this just didn't feel like the right way to start that. BUT before you get too mad, there is going to be some Jeller magic next chapter and I promise next time I won't deny you the big Jeller moment!

I just need this story to be not just about Jeller, but also about Jane and the team healing. So I brought in someone I think might surprise you. But hopefully in a good way!

Lots and lots of love even if you hate me,

Fallen

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

After the team had dispersed from their conversation with Borden, Zapata couldn't seem to get Jane off her mind. Replaying again and again the moment where Jane had collapsed in the elevator, and the mess of scars they'd revealed on her body.

Between that and the haggard, messy appearance of Jane in the office yesterday she felt like a monster. All her own crimes seemed to hang even heavier on her neck then they ever had before. Part of her had always known that her animosity toward Jane, had been driven largely by her own guilt and disappointment in herself.

But now, she almost felt like she didn't recognize herself. She had never been the type of person to kick someone while they were down. Sure, she's a sarcastic bitch, and sometimes she can take that too far. But she'd always had her limits.

Then Jane came back, and suddenly she had the perfect outlet for all the pent up feeling she'd had in the past year and a half. Jane made it too easy, taking every single thing she threw at her and coming back for more.

Not that it made it any better. In fact, it only made it worse.

Jane had been her friend before all of that, they'd gone out to drinks regularly, eating lunch as often as they had it free and generally just having fun. She had loved getting Jane out of her element and exposing her to all the things she didn't even know she'd been missing.

Then she'd let Kurt send her to the Cia without a second thought, and even after learning what had befallen her there. She'd had no mercy.

Ironic when she'd betrayed the team and Mayfair as badly as Jane had. She just would have gotten Mayfair thrown in jail, and her motivations had been less good-natured then Jane's.

Jane at least had wanted to protect them, she'd only wanted to protect herself.

God, she really had become a monster.

She could hardly blame Jane if she never wanted to let her back into her life. But she also knew that she couldn't stand to look herself in the mirror if she went home without at least trying to take a step in the right direction.

That thought was exactly how she found herself standing in front of Jane's favorite takeout restaurant ordering Jane's favorite appetizer, dinner and dessert, as well as a few extra things for them to try. IF nothing else, it would get some meat on her bones.

When she had the food, she forced herself to make her way to Jane's apartment just a few blocks away from the restaurant.

Her heart pounding in her chest as she drew closer and closer to her destination. She knew that Jane would likely throw her food back in her face and tell her exactly what she thought of her pathetic attempt at reconnecting after all Tasha had done to her.

But she had to do this. She had to try to make this right or she'd spend the rest of her life regretting it. She didn't want to have anymore regrets to keep her company at night.

When she finally found herself standing in front of Jane's safehouse door, she almost didn't know what to do. But finally she stepped onto the stoop and rang the doorbell, her stomach tightening with fear and her adrenaline activating as it prepared for flight or fight reaction.

She prepared herself for a thousand possibilities as she rang the door bell.

But she never prepared herself for Jane opening the door wide and allowing her in after a mini-interrogation.

It took her a second to gather the courage to step through the door, but she did it.

When she did it took her all her power not to let her mouth drop open, she hadn't been to Jane's safe house since Jane returned from the CIA, but the changes from before were frightening. Before, Jane's safe-house had been homely, lived in, the wall covered with sketches and photos ranging from blurry selfies from Jane's phone to professional shot's she'd taken after Patterson introduced her to a real camera.

Now the walls were barren, no longer the sunshine yellow they'd painted them after a few too many bottles of wine one evening with Patterson's Beatles playlist on in the background, instead they were the standard issue grey. It seemed as if someone had sucked all the life out of the place, and taken the furniture with them.

Instead of the homely collection of mix matched furniture that always reminded her of warm Sunday's back at home, a large matt dominated most the room and a small raggedy black lazy boy cowered in the corner.

"So…" In that moment, Tasha realized she'd been standing just inside the door staring silently into the room for at least a full minute.

Good God, she'd already fucked this up.

"I'm sorry," She mumbled, turning towards Jane and offering her a timid smile, "I guess I didn't think you'd let me in if I'm being honest."

Jane gave her one of those smiles that looked like it hurt, before her eyes drifted down to the floor, "I don't know why I did, but I don't want to be alone right now. And I guess I miss how it used to be."

Tasha hated what they'd become in that moment, and if she didn't think it would do more harm than good she might have hugged Jane. Why had she done this to them? Jane had been one of her best friends and look at what she'd done to her.

"I do too," Tasha whispered, before thrusting forward the food to avoid having to put into words all the thoughts running through her head. Jane didn't want to listen to that, not right now, "Here, I went to your favorite place, those little sweet rolls you like are in there."

Jane took the bag from her and walked across the room to settle on the matt near the lazyboy. Suddenly she looked embarrassed, "I never really got the chance to get new furniture for the place…" She trailed off, and Tasha couldn't tell if she'd become trapped in a memory or simply didn't know what to say after that.

"It's fine, when I first moved to New York I ate on my living room floor every day for the first four months. I didn't want a roommate, so I settled for eating ramen out of coffee mugs until I saved up enough to live like a real person," Tasha confided as she moved to sit by Jane on the floor, accepting the contained that Jane passed to her.

"I don't think you ever told me that story before," Jane told her as she fished out the box of sweet rolls, and gingerly took one out. Tasha couldn't help but think that she looked as if she were waiting for someone to take it away from her. She didn't want to think about why she might think that. But she'd seen enough to imagine.

She forced herself to laugh, "Well it isn't something I broadcast, I gotta keep my reputation at the office, ya know?"

Jane just shrugged as she began to pick at the roll in her hands, and the silence stretched between them as Tasha started to eat too, hoping Jane might feel safer eating if she ate with her. Though it felt awkward, the silence didn't hold the tension it normally held, and Tasha knew that it was because for once she wasn't being such a bitch.

She watched as Jane managed to eat half of a roll before she casually dropped the rest back in the box. If she hadn't of been paying such close attention she might not have noticed. Jane used to eat the whole box.

God, how had they not noticed how bad she'd gotten?

She'd lost herself in thought as she forced food into her mouth, but when she looked up she noticed Jane staring at her.

"Natasha, why did you come tonight?" Jane's voice no louder than a whisper as her green eyes seemed to widen.

Tasha forced herself to take a deep breath before she answered, "Look Jane, I know I've been a bitch since you got back and there's nothing I can say that can change that fact. But at the end of the day, you're my friend, and I'm sorry that when you needed me the most I took every chance I had to push you down," Jane looked like she wanted to say something but Tasha held her hand up, "Please, just let me get this out. If I don't it will never get said and it needs to be. I've been a shit friend, and I've let you down in more ways than one. Being in that elevator, seeing you like that, made me realize it. There's not an excuse in the world that justifies it taking that for me to realize how bad things had gotten. But it did, so I'm here, because I want to work to mend that bridge."

She sighed, "I know, that it's not going to be easy, and I'm going to have to work to earn your trust back. But I'm here to let you know that I'm ready to put the work in."

Jane didn't say a word as she drew her speech to a close, and after what felt like hours under the weight of her gaze Tasha flung her eyes to the side desperate to escape the look Jane gave her in that moment. An awful combination of fear, hope, sadness and anger, just the hint of a flinch in her gaze as if she were waiting for Tasha to rip the rug out from under her feet.

So, she didn't see Jane slowly move forward until she felt hands skim her shoulder and then she found herself with an arm full as Jane leaned in to hug her. It felt nothing like the old hugs, Jane's full body pressed against hers, her arms wrapped tight and the sensation of home.

Now her arms almost seemed to hover around her body, and the muscle in her back felt tighter then a bow string as her own arms came up to wrap around her.

But still it felt like coming home.

If Jane's breath came a little quicker, and her shoulder's shook just ever so slightly, well no one had to know. Her own eyes felt a little wetter, and her breath hitched as she felt the weight of her own mistakes pressing down on her so unbelievably.

Even after all this, Jane would never chance, always seeing the best in people. Always offering them a second chance. Tasha wasn't dumb enough to think she deserved one but she sure as hell wouldn't squander the one she'd been given.

She had no idea how long they embraced before Jane pulled away her cheeks rosy and her eyes glassy. But it wouldn't be until almost midnight that she left Jane's safe house to make the lonely journey home.

Though they had so much more ground to cover before Tasha would truly earn back the title of friend, she thought after tonight she might actually have hope.

That night she slept well, none of the guilty nightmares that had plagued her sleep for months biting at the edges of her dreams. Unbeknownst to her across town, Jane had fallen into a sleep equally peaceful, and for once it seemed the nightmares had found others soul to torture and torment.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Hope you guys don't utterly hate me but I promise Jane/Kurt interactions to come!


	7. Chapter 7

Hey guys,

Sorry I've been away so long, nursing school kicked my ass this semester (but I passed with straight B's, which let me tell you is a miracle), and then I went on a very long vacation. I'm back though and I'm really excited to get back into things with writing! Hopefully some of you have hung on despite my absence and I hope you enjoy this next chapter!

Love you guys as always and look forward to hearing what you think about this chapter! I'm going to try to get some mushy-gushy Kurt/Jane stuff either this chapter or next. But as you might have garnered my muse doesn't always take me in certain directions. But as always, I can promise this is a Jeller fic in the end, or at the very least a fix it with an ending that will lean in that direction.

Lots of love,

Fallen

Also a huge shout out to my amazing editor Marablackwolf! She is a life saver and I couldn''t say enough kind words about her! Editors are probably the single most important part of a stories creation because they temper crazy authors like me. Without them our stories would enevitably be full of grammatical errors, run far too long, and maybe not always take the best direction! So glad you contacted me, and hope you know how much I appreciate you and all the others editors out there!

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

When Jane awoke the next morning she felt refreshed, a clarity that came only from a good night's sleep settling over her as she went about her morning routine. After her training and her shower, she even indulged herself by frying up a small omelet and toasting herself two pieces of bread. Her stomach had growled this morning; after keeping the food she ate yesterday down she knew she could keep the trend going.

Despite the conversation with Zapata, and the hope that came with it, she knew she'd shown the team too much weakness. It seemed to be working in her favor for the moment but she couldn't allow it to happen again.

Clearly, she had made a miscalculation the other day when she came into the office, and she couldn't afford another. She had been forcing herself to eat the bare minimum to function before this, and drink as little as she could get away with. But she understood now that she had to push herself further than that if she wanted to continue to maintain her façade of strength.

So, as she ate she forced herself to down two and a half glasses of water. Though with each swallow she had to fight her innate physical reaction to the intrusion. After what the CIA had done to her, every sip brought her back to the tub where they drowned her or reminded her of wet towels shoved over her mouth and nose, as water rained down upon her face.

She thought she might have loved the water once.

Upon occasion, her dreams would begin with bursts of memories of the beach. She thought Shepherd might have taken Roman and her to one regularly in the summer months.

But now even the shower felt like torture. Just the sound of water put her on edge.

Sometimes she wondered how no one had noticed, but she'd mastered the art of lying so long ago. Maybe the wonder was that she even realized she'd been lying at all, for it seemed as if truth had grown far more foreign to her than any lie she might come up with.

Still, she forced herself to finish her meal though her thoughts had turned the food to ash in her mouth and the water made her want to puke. Then she stood and moved to exit the apartment, meeting her detail on the street and following them to the car.

As always, the car ride to work passed silently between them. They never spoke to her, maintaining a professionally cool distance. Before, she would try to bridge the gap, chatting idly at them as they drove or walked around with her.

But she no longer made the attempt.

She understood why they would want to maintain their distance. Already she imagined they suffered at work having to guard the FBI's most notorious pariah. She doubted an illusion of warmth or friendship between them would help them in this regard. So, she did the little she could to help them, and made it clear publicly how little she thought or cared for them.

Sometimes she thought she saw a hint of gratitude in their eyes.

She tried not to let that hurt her.

When they finally arrived at the FBI she let them follow her up the stairs, avoiding the elevator as staunchly as everyone avoided her. After her full breakfast, she tackled the stairs like a pro, hardly noticing the hitch of effort it took her to get to her floor. They broke away from her as she pushed the door open and headed towards her desk.

Like normal she'd come early, but only about thirty minutes or so compared to her normal hour to two hours. She didn't know if the team had checked up on her habits with their new-found concern and she didn't want them to question her about anything else.

To her surprise though, most of the team, expecting Kurt already milled around the office. She did her best to skirt around them without notice but Patterson quickly spotted her.

Jane tried not to flinch as the blonde approached with a full smile on her face, "Good morning Jane! Nice to see you looking so bright eyed this morning, did you rest well?"

"Yes, thank you," Jane replied, not sure what else to say.

Patterson's smile seemed to grow brighter somehow; Jane really didn't know how she managed to be so perky all the time, "That's great Jane, have you eaten breakfast yet? Zapata and I were about to send Reade down to get us some donuts from the cafeteria, I'm sure he wouldn't mind grabbing you one as well."

"Oh, trust me, he definitely wouldn't mind," Zapata spoke up from the other side of the bull pen, "He owes us all some food after _the incident_ anyway, isn't that right Reade?"

Reade put his hands up, "Why'd you have to bring that up Tasha? I was going to pick Jane up a donut anyway, I remember she used to love the one with the blueberries in it," He looked at her helplessly before muttering to himself, "Can't go one day without being harassed around here."

Zapata slung her arm over his shoulder, though she had to stretch to do it, "Don't look so butt hurt Reade, keep it up and I might just tell Jane all about the incident I was referring to."

Now he looked scared, but their friendly banter only made Jane feel more out of place. They hadn't included her in so long she no longer really understood her role in their games, "That's it, I'm leaving, and before you say anything I'm getting donuts and coffees for everyone. Jesus."

Before anyone could respond, he had shrugged Tasha off and headed for the stairs. Jane might have thought he'd been genuinely mad but she'd managed to catch the small smile tugging at his face.

"See Jane, that's how you have to handle the men folk when they try to cause trouble," Zapata explained as she walked up to join Patterson beside her, "They protest but we all know they secretly like being told what to do."

Jane did her best to smile and nod; after last night things between her and Zapata weren't as frosty as they had been before but she didn't think they were friends again yet.

"I'll try to remember that," she attempted to joke, though she felt as if her tone fell flat. Even after one of the first real nights of sleep she'd had since the CIA she still felt off; grey in comparison to the full palette of emotions the others seemed to display.

Patterson giggled, "Not as if you need any help in that department Jane."

"Jane's always been a bit of a man-killer, hasn't she?" Zapata joked back, but Jane froze at her words, images of Oscar floating to the surface.

When she looked down she could swear her hands were covered in blood, "Excuse me, I need to go to the bathroom," she whispered as she turned and fled to the bathroom. As soon as she got there she started to furiously scrub her hands trying to rid them of the blood. But no matter how hard she scrubbed it never seemed to go away.

Her finger tips had started to bleed, distorting the white porcelain of the sink when she felt delicate hands cover her own, "Jane stop, you're going to hurt yourself if you don't."

She hadn't even heard Patterson come in.

What was _wrong_ with her?

"I just can't seem to get it off," she whispered, hating herself instantly for the confession.

Patterson just looked confused, her large green eyes filled with uncertainty and sadness, "Jane, there's nothing on your hands. They're perfectly clean, I promise."

Jane had to bite her lips to stop herself from saying anymore. She didn't need Patterson to think her anymore damaged than she already was.

As if sensing her discomfort, Patterson turned the water off, and slowly dried Jane's hands with paper towels. "Are you going to be okay now Jane? Zapata's worried but I didn't think you'd want to be crowded."

"I'm fine," Jane told her with a smile that didn't touch her eyes, "I didn't mean to bother you guys."

"You're never a bother Jane, I just wanted to make sure you were okay, you tore into here like a bat out of hell."

Jane shrugged and extracted her hands from Patterson's grasp, "Thank you for checking on me, but I'm ready to go back to work. I won't let the team down."

For some reason's Patterson's face seemed to twist at her words, "Jane, the team needs you to be better because we care about you not because of what you do for the team. You understand, that right?"

Jane ignored her, sure they'd had one good day but she knew the truth. She knew her value to them. She also knew what would happen if her value ran out, even if the others cared (which she doubted), Naz would see to it.

Her wrists ached at the mere thought. The ghost sting of cold metal tightening around them enough to make her sick.

But she couldn't afford anymore weakness, so she gave Patterson her best smile, "I'm fine, really Patterson, just got in my own head for a moment. You know how important the work we do here is to me."

Patterson didn't look like she believed a word Jane said, she smiled but somehow it didn't seem to make it to her eyes, "Of course, now should we head back out there? Reade should be back with those donuts any second now and I think I'm pretty close to cracking one of the tattoo cases."

Jane nodded, her eyes drifting back down to her hands- still covered in blood- as she followed Patterson back down the hallway into the bull pen.

"You okay Jane?" Zapata asked quietly, walking to stand beside her, "I didn't think before I spoke…" She trailed off but she looked genuinely troubled by what had happened.

"It's okay, I'm good," she responded, her eyes haunted though she forced a smile to her lips, "I just have a lot on my mind. Sorry if I worried you."

Zapata shook her head, "Its nothing, like I said last night, I'm trying to be better, Jane. Worrying about you is part of that."

A more genuine smile tugged on her lips, and Zapata smiled back. Before they could say more the elevator let out a ding and Reade emerged, two full boxes of donuts in his hands.

"If this isn't enough to satisfy you vultures, then there's nothing I can really say to you at this point," He told them all with a harried look on his face, "I think every person I passed tried to snake these from me, so you all best appreciate my effort."

"Oh, we do, don't worry Reade. But we're going to appreciate those donuts a whole lot more, try not to let it bother you," Tasha shot back, throwing Jane a smirk as she practically hauled her over to the donuts.

Patterson flittered through to grab one before hustling off to her lab, calling over her shoulder, her mouth already half-full, "Got a hit, meet in the conference room in twenty minutes."

Reade handed her a donut as she approached, and she smiled when she realized he had indeed remembered her favorite kind. "There's two more in the boxes, I'll make sure to fend off the others so you can eat them later."

His kind smile made her look away. She really didn't know how to handle the way the team had been behaving the last few days. It took a considerable effort not to expect them to laugh at her, to reveal this all to be a part of some sick joke they'd been playing on her.

"I see you brought us all donuts Reade, I'm guessing this is the makeup for the _incident?_ I'd almost begun to believe you'd forgotten," Kurt materialized behind Reade, reaching around him to grab a Boston cream donut.

Reade just let out a groan, "Why does everyone keep bringing that up? Give a man a break, help me out here Jane."

She just shrugged, "I don't even know what they're talking about so I think you're on your own."

She started to shuffle backward, uncomfortable with this new inclusion and Kurt's unexpected presence. She just wanted to go to her desk, eat a bite or two of the donut and then prepare for the case.

Kurt's voice stopped her, "Jane, good to see you looking so rested today, are you following the doctor's instructions?"

She nodded glancing up at him, and trying to decipher the look in his eyes, "I've been cleared by him, there won't be a repeat." If only because she had zero intentions of getting on an elevator again.

"Good, well Patterson thinks she's cracked another case, are you feeling up to field work? Patterson could always use you here." He seemed to smile at her, and the expression looked genuine. But she didn't know if she believed it.

"I'll be fine in the field," she told him after a momentary pause. For a second it almost looked as if he were going to reach out to her but she didn't know if it had been a trick of the light.

He nodded and gave her one last hint of smile before heading towards his office. As soon as he opened his door, she moved away from Reade and Zapata towards her desk. She had ten minutes now before they had to meet in the conference room for the next case.

She took a bite of her donut as she sat down at her desk, and her eyes closed with a hum of satisfaction. She couldn't remember the last time she'd had one of these, it must have been at least a month before the CIA. But she found that without conscious thought she managed to finish the whole donut as she scrolled through her work emails looking for anything important.

As she brushed the crumbs from her desk, she noticed the others getting up and heading towards the conference room so she stood to follow them. By the time she squeezed in through the door everyone else sat around the table, most everyone shot her a small smile as she moved to sit- all but Naz, who sat across from her gave her a pointed frown.

Jane doubted anything she could do _anything_ to please that woman, short of perhaps dropping dead.

As if sensing her eyes, Naz spoke, "Nice of you to finally join us Jane, I was beginning to worry that you might not be taking this mission as seriously as the rest of us."

An awkward silence met her statement, and the room seemed to freeze. But her words hit Jane like a freight train, "It won't happen again." She stated, trying to project strength when all she wanted to do was fade into oblivion.

Naz's beady eyes seemed to cut right through her, "See that it doesn't, I'd hate for the director to decide you're too much trouble."

Jane only nodded, her eyes drifting to the table as she tried to ignore the piercing gaze being shot across the table at her. She heard Zapata say something but her mind was too far away to really hear it. By the time she tuned back in the room felt charged with anger, and it's oppressive weight seemed to choke her.

She tuned back in just to hear Naz get the final word in whatever argument had just erupted, "No matter how you feel, Agent Zapata," distain dripped from her words, "The matter comes down to bureau politics, and we all know Jane is skating on thin ice as is. If you really cared for her, you'd have given her the same warning I just did. But I do believe Agent Patterson had something to share before your outburst."

Jane sometimes wondered when the woman before her had turned to ice. But maybe like Shepard she'd been born that way, with a heart too full of hatred and a lust for power for true emotions to ever take root.

But before she could give it too much thought Patterson stared, her voice betraying her discomfort, "Well, now that's settled, let's get started. So, things have been quiet since we dealt with the Venezuela bombings last week. But this morning, I got a hit on one of Jane's tattoos," As she spoke, she fiddled with her tablet, pulling up a picture of the scorpion tattoo placed on the outside of her left thigh. Jane remembered that before she had almost liked that one. But electrical burns now spattered through the imagine making it nearly unrecognizable. "This scorpion- when we were first investigating the tattoos I searched all the obvious things. But I managed to miss the most obvious connection of all."

As she spoke, she pressed another button and a logo that reminded Jane of a flattened umbrella popped onto the screen, "Now most of you should be familiar with this, it's the logo for the private military organization Electra. Of course, you're probably thinking, 'Patterson what does this have to do with a scorpion?' Well I promise you I'm getting there. Now at first, I didn't understand why these popped up together either. But when I did some digging I discovered that Electra has a private group within their organization called "The Scorpions". They are their most elite unit, and they have a reputation for getting up to nasty business. They get the job done, but there has been a lot of noise raised about their methods within branches of the military that they interact with."

She paused gathering her breath, "Sadly though, as we all know, this isn't exactly out of the ordinary for private military organizations. So, I wasn't sure what about this unit was so special, until I dug deeper. I found out that in the last month 6 members of this group have gone missing, each seemly picked up one day and walked out of their lives. No one has seen or heard from them since, but it wasn't until the 7th person went missing last night that things started to appear fishy. This time whatever happened didn't go as smoothly, and the victim, Sonja Redding, was able to post an s.o.s message to her private server."

"So, how do we know that they're all connected?" Naz asked, her eyes seeming to bore into Patterson's from across the table.

"See, law enforcement still doesn't think they are, but I did some more digging," Images began to pile onto the screen, appearing to be from multiple homes and one office. "See, here's what bothered me, look closely at all these locations, in the top corner of the room is a small symbol."

The images enhanced until they could make out a small poppy with a dagger through its center in the top right corner of each room. "Now the first time I ran this image through the data base I got a whole lot of bad tattoos, but the second time I ran it through this popped up."

Images, clearly from the Middle East popped up on the screen; people lying dead in doorways, blood soaked walls, and crumbled burned ruins flew across the screen, "In these, this same image was found, and it took me a while but I was able to match the majority of these images to missions carried out by the Scorpions."

"So, what are you thinking?" Reade asked, "Do we have a rogue on our hands or is this someone getting revenge for something the Scorpions got into while they were overseas?"

Patterson gave a small shrug, "I'm not sure yet, but right now it looks like whoever is doing this has 7 of the 22 members of Scorpion. There have been no bodies found, but someone with this level of skill would have no problem hiding bodies. But, until we find otherwise, we have to operate under the assumption that these 7 people are still alive."

"Do we know who the commander of this unit is?" Kurt asked, already ready to get the show on the road.

"Yes, former Lieutenant Colonel Daniel Hudson, he left the Marines eight years ago and formed Electra almost immediately. It only took them two years to earn the reputation as one of the most ruthless and efficient private contracting groups in the country."

"I'll pull some strings and see if we can't get a meeting with him," Naz told them, "Is there anything else Patterson?"

"Nothing relevant, I just don't understand why there isn't something being done about this. You'd think Hudson would be more concerned that his best unit is being picked apart."

Kurt just shook his head, "I'm sure if he's doing anything about it none of us would hear about it. These are the kind of people who are used to operating outside the law."

"Well something tells me he's not going to welcome us all sniffing around," Reade said, and Jane silently agreed. The man in the photos had the same look in his eyes that Keaton did. The look of a man who got enjoyment out of other people's suffering.

She hated that fear instantly coiled in her stomach at the sight.

"Alright, Patterson keep digging, Reade, Zapata I want you to head to the most recent crime scene and see what you can find. Naz get us in contact with the General. Jane, you and I are going to head over to Electra's headquarters and see if we can get anyone to talk to us."

She nodded, getting up from her chair to follow him as the other dispersed from the table.

Something in her gut told her that this case wasn't going to be an easy one and apprehension built inside her as they headed towards the locker room to get ready for the case. She'd learned to trust her gut and she had a feeling they were all going to regret stumbling upon this case.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

So I'm leaving us there for the moment, to build up for the next chapter! I promise A. lots of Jeller, but B. lots of danger.

POLL Time!

Next chapter would you like to see:

A. Jane get injured

B. The team kidnapped

C. Kurt be injured


End file.
